The OffSpring of Darkness: Trusting the Lesser Light
I’d been diligently walking the streets of D.C. My eyes attracted to everything blooming. My nose following the alluring smells of roses, gardenias, and hyacinths. The trees, standing tall and assuredly, bustling with greenery again—their bare disguise of winter finally gone. Above the ground this is the story each of them told; this is what the eye could see and what the mind could understand. But I knew it not to be the full story. I knew spring to also be a time when things needed to break in order to open up. I knew that below the surface, in the darkness of the soil, was where the true offering of spring was being made.
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Love & Basketball: A Year Governed by Fire & the Phoenix
The desert I’d crossed, the flames that chased me along that unknown path had led me here: a fortress built and sustained by my own hands and something far beyond me. It has roots, like a tree, and yet, it defies all laws of matter and sense. For it is not a place at all, too powerful to be contained, too elusive to be truly named. The best word I can find for it, right now, is love. Love, passion, inspiration, confidence, and transformation—these are the elements we are attuning to in 2024: a year governed by fire and the phoenix.
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The Kingdom of Small
As you begin to put words to where this year has taken you, resist the need to over look small. Resist the need to think big is always and only better. For that matter, keep the two separated, one is a fruit and the other a vegetable. Small is the steps that we must each take, towards any vision…towards anything that we wish to accomplish. Small is the how. Small is the way we get there, to big…to the vision…to the end. Small is the practical steps that makes anything not only possible, but manageable, hospitable.
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We are Inherently Fearless: As Interviewed by MysticMag
Dr. Darrien Jamar (They/Them), driven by a childhood anthem about soaring possibilities, embarked on a profound journey questioning beliefs and discovering a passion for guiding others toward their fullest potential. From the exuberant preschool graduate to the practitioner today, Darrien recognizes that our destinies pivot on embracing our authentic selves. As a result, they delve into empowering individuals to shed limiting beliefs, nurturing a vision of purpose, love, and fulfillment. It’s Darrien’s mission to illuminate paths, enabling others to spread their wings and soar towards their unique destinies. MysticMag has the pleasure.
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When Grief is Still
Grief is not limited to death; even positive changes in our life can inspire a sense of loss (heaviness) within us. To live a resilient and empowered life, we must be able to approach and navigate both loss and gains mindfully and heartfully—trusting our innate capacity to withstand moments of healthy vulnerability…trusting our ability to find our center, again. I share with you how grieving forward this year has led me to a place of stillness, to a place of gratitude, to a more embodied version of myself.
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As Featured in Bold Journey Magazine
“My work, the work I have been called to do, is about guiding others back to themselves. I know for sure that all roads lead back to the quality of the relationship that you have with yourself. That day, in kindergarten, was prophetic in a sense. It has become a metaphor for my life…for my work. That day I learned I was strong enough to walk the road before me, and those roads I would have to travel later in life. We have it within ourselves to become the people we have been destined to be, and life will help us do that…I am here to help others do that. I have been called to help others walk their own dirt roads.”
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The Urge to Rearrange
Fall has this way of initiating, not only in nature, but within us, a primitive inclination to purge, to shed, to slow down and look closer. Traditionally, we have associated this season with language such as letting go, surrender, and change. I am not saying those descriptors are no longer true or applicable, because at the heart of what I am saying is they are—but, perhaps, its more refreshing and relevant to think of this moment as a time, urge, and instinct to (gently) rearrange parts of your life.
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Now In Reach: Transcending Trauma
I will continue to write my way forward. Writing has helped me right my way to a higher ground. Writing has saved me, its baptized me in the sacred waters of truth. Writing has been my shepherd, my rod and staff through many dark nights. Writing reflects me, the parts that are lost and found. Writing has helped me discover and rediscover myself. Writing has given me direction—a future to look forward to. And that’s where I am headed, there are places I am now ready to go.
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Two Slices of Lemon Cake: Encountering True Happiness
“Without thinking twice, I jumped up, remembering my Uncle had brought over a homemade lemon cake. After eating my first slice too quickly, I decided to get another. I chuckled. Watching myself eat this second slice without feeling guilty or ashamed. I didn’t entertain those old thoughts that once accompanied a moment such as this. This is it, I thought. This is what it means to be happy, to be found…to be located inside.”
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As Featured In CanvasRebel
“Doing inner child work has played a crucial role in helping me open my heart and throat chakras to much deeper understandings of who I truly am. Slowly, I have divorced the belief and underlying fears that kept me trapped in the energy of being shy; I have stopped running away from what I have to say and share with the world. Ultimately, I am finding the authority to trust my own perceptions and what that leads me to say and do.”
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The Roads We Are Called to Walk
What do you do when the only choice that remains is to face your Goliath? In those moments, your fears can become the road that takes you directly to your light, to your inner strength. With this clarity and new found awareness of yourself, you begin to notice the tone of your prayers shift. Instead of asking to be saved or for your fears and thorns to be removed, you begin asking for the power to stay. Grant me the strength, courage, and grace to walk the road before me. Indeed, a transition is taking place; a new discovery is unfolding within you.
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Joy is my Witness
I felt myself remembering things I hadn’t realized I’d forgotten. I was reminded of my natural ability to find stable ground again. Like the willow that stood so assuredly, I reflected on the things that have continued to sustain me: the habits of mind, the faith and grace. I gently recalled the things that, in just a day, had offered me so much joy. I realized, too, that there were still things that felt unresolved, things that getting out to the country hadn’t taken away—but that was okay. I was learning to live with things unfinished. And although I couldn’t let go of everything completely, I could hang on loosely. Loosely loosely loosely, I began to chant.
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Sunflowers & Crows: Grief Illuminating Love
“God keep you alright, is how she ended that voicemail, every call and conversation. And now, I could only ask that God would keep her alright. I prayed, asking that the love she shared, spread, and instilled in my heart and many others, that it would grant her soul full admission into eternal serenity. I’d miss her, but I knew she wouldn’t be far.”
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When Left Turns Right
“The lesson may not be to make better decisions or be a better person. The lesson may be much simpler: change your beliefs. Make some new decisions. Let yourself discover some new, better, sunnier beliefs about yourself and your life. Allow yourself to believe that the decisions you make are fine.” -Melody Beattie
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2023: The Year of the Black Swan
It was only the Ugly Duckling until that special moment came, when it realized it was a Swan. It wasn’t just a shift of mindset, but more specifically, it was a shift in heart consciousness. The Ugly Duckling accessed truth, power, and harmony that was already alive inside: I am a Swan. The story shifted from victim to victor. And as it was then, it is now. Expect a change in scenery, expect an expansion in your way of being. The Black Swan is here to guide us through 2023; be wise to its presence and meaning.
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Flying Over Water
Its often felt like three different people living inside: me, the Divine, and the Devil. There is the part that dances between being lost and found; afraid and necessarily vulnerable. There is God, the insightful, graceful, compassionate, and ever seeking voice. And then there is the Devil, the sabateour, the voice of ego, the face of my unhealed past, fears, and insecurities. Each year, I come to know each part better. Each year, I grow in my understanding of each voice, deciphering what is true and what is not. If, at the end of the year, you have gained access to greater understanding and clarity—and thus, your power, then you have done the work. You have passed the course of this year.
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A Necessary Handicap
“Many of us are living with handicaps. Some will change over time but other’s won’t. If that’s the case, stop waiting for your handicap to disappear. Instead, decide to live with it. Work around it. Treat yourself with care, with gentleness. Allow yourself to feel and experience all the limitations and emotions of your present situation. Accept them. Let them be part of you, part of your experience.” -Melody Beattie
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Mostly Falling
Its a learning, an understanding, and a heart-full willingness that we find from someplace deep within. Once accessed, while with resistance at first, we let ourselves fall. Then, we get back up again, we re-emerge. But first, we fall. We must fall, willingly. It’s in our willingness to fall that we find our strength and agency. Our fall serves as the first and last step to our emergence. If you are stuck or at your wits end today, consider your need to fall.
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As Featured in VoyageBaltimore
“What guided me there, then, is what continues to guide me in both my personal life and in practice/business: listening, and obeying the inner voice within.”
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Falling and Emerging
I’d shared with a friend that I have been practicing Muay Thai for about five months now. I explained how much I loved it and can see myself going further with it. My friend simply responded, “that makes sense to me, you have always been a fighter.” I thought more about his words later, as I would have never described myself, in my past, as a fighter. It was then that I realized he was right. I realized too, in order to give ourselves permission to step into a new way of being, seeing ourselves, and engaging in this world—the old must fall away. Only then, can what’s always been there emerge more fully.
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